busy mode

ilang linggo (o buwan na ata) ko na din di nakakausap yung mga bestbuds ko. oo sobrang busy ko, pero kahit ganon ako may oras ako para sa lahat. kaya lang ngayon sinadya ko na walang communication sa kanila. sa ngayon, hindi ko sila gusto makasama. iba ang pinili ko. kasi ayaw ko maging unfair. nagkaroon na nga kami ng konting pagtatalo. pero don na din nagsimula sa isip ko na di sa lahat ng oras magkakasundo kami. may kanya-kanya kaming hilig o gusto na mga bagay-bagay. inaamin ko naman eh… iba ko sa kanila.

hindi ko hilig makihalubilo sa ibang tao. kaya nga sila lang ang bestbuds ko. pero siyempre may isang tao na special talaga sa kin noon pa. at ngayon lang dumating yung pagkakataon na malaman ng special someone ko ang feelings ko para sa kanya. kaya siguro ganon ko na lang siya pahalagahan. siguro totoo nga ang sinasabi ng bestbuds ko na nagiging unfair na ko sa kanila. pero sana maintindihan na nila na gusto ko lang sulitin yung oras & atensyon ko para sa special someone ko. kung yung mga nakalipas na buwan hindi na naging maganda ang naging pakikisama ko sa kanila… sana ipagpauminhin nila. sa ngayon di ko gusto na kasama sila… naisip ko din na di lang sa kanila dapat umikot ang mundo ko…

ok lang tawagin nila ko na walang kwenta. opinyon nila yon… malaki na kami at may kanya-kanya din kaming buhay

tree… wind… leaf

A story of love in three perspectives…we could be the tree, the leaf or the wind once in our lives for all we know…a good read..

TREE
People call me "Tree".

I had dated 5 girls when I was in Pre-U. There's one girl who I love a lot but never dared to go after. She didn't have a pretty face, or good figure, nor an outstanding charm. She was just an ordinary girl. I liked her. I really liked her.I liked her innocence, her frankness, her intelligence and her fragility. Reason for not going after her was because I felt somebody so ordinary like her was not a good match for me. I was also afraid that after we were together, all the feelings would vanish. I was also afraid other's gossip would hurt her. I felt that if she were my girl, she'd be mine ultimately and I didn't have to give up everything just for her. The last reason, made her accompanying me for 3 years.She watched me chase other girls, and I have made her heart cry for 3 years. She was a good actress and me a demanding director. When I kissed my 2nd girlfriend, she bumped into us. She was embarrassed but smiled and said, "Go on!" before running off. The next day, her eyes were swollen like a walnut. I didn't want to know what caused her to cry. Later that day, I returned from soccer training to get something and watched her cry in the classroom for an hour or so.My 4th girlfriend didn't like her. There was once when both of them quarreled. I know that based on her character, she's not the type that will start off the quarrel. But I still sided my girlfriend. I shouted at her and ignored her feelings then walked off with my girlfriend.

The next day, she was laughing and joking with me like nothing happened. I know she was hurt but she didn't know deep down inside I was hurt too.When I broke up with my 5th girlfriend, I asked her out. Later that day, I told her I had something to tell her. I told her about my breakup.Coincidentally, she has something to tell me too, about her getting together. I knew who the guy was. His pursuit for her had been the talk of the school.I didn't show her my heartache, just smiles and best wishes. Once I reached home, I couldn't breathe. Tears rolled and I broke down. How many times have I seen her cry for the man who didn't acknowledge her presence? During graduation, I received a text message from her. It said,"Leaf's departure is because of Wind's pursuit. Or because the Tree didn't ask her to stay …"
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my choices

It’s quiet. My coffee is hot. The sky is still black. The world is still asleep. The day is coming.

In a few moments the day will arrive. It will roar down the track with the rising of the sun. The stillness of the dawn will be exchanged for the noise of the day. The calm will be replaced by the pounding pace of the human race. The refuge of the early morning will be invaded by decisions to be made and deadlines to be met. For the next twelve hours I will be exposed to the day’s demands. It is now that I must make a choice. Because of Calvary, I’m free to choose. And so I choose.

I choose love …

No occasion justifies hatred; no injustice warrants bitterness. I choose love. Today I will love God and what God loves.

I choose joy…

I will invite my God to be the God of circumstance. I will refuse the temptation to be cynical… the tool of the lazy thinker. I will refuse to see people as anything less than human beings, created by God. I will refuse to see any problem as anything less than an opportunity to see God.

I choose peace…

I will live forgiven. I will forgive so that I may live.

I choose patience…

I will overlook the inconveniences of the world. Instead of cursing the one who takes my place, I’ll invite him to do so. Rather than complain that he wait is too long, I will thank God for a moment to pray. Instead of clinching my fist at new assignments, I will face them with joy and courage. 

I choose kindness…

I will be kind to the poor, for they are alone. Kind to the rich, for they are afraid. And kind to the unkind, for such is how God has created me.
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moving

balik maynila na ko pagkatapos ng halos 1 linggo sa tacloban. nakaka-miss mukhang naiwan ata don ang puso ko (bwahahaha.. ). masaya ko sa pag-stay ko don. naalala ko noon bata pa ko kapag pumupunta ko don di ko kaya mag-stay ng matagal. kasi iyak ako ng iyak. nami-miss ko si nanay rosie at gusto ko umuwi ng maynila. pero ngayon iba na… kasi malaki na ko

kahit busy ako sa pag-aasikaso ng birth certificate ko may time pa din ako para makapagmuni-muni. naiisip ko yung mga tao na naiwan ko sa maynila. hinahanap kaya nila ko? kasi sinadya ko talaga na di sabihin na aalis ako. pero di ko natiis, kahit di nila tinatanong kung nasaan ako. sinabi ko pa din kung nasaan ako. wala lang, baka kasi bigla nila ko kailanganin at least alam nila kung saan ako mahahanap.
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runaway

5 days na ko andito sa tacloban para kunin ang birth certificate ko. ok naman, di ko naman totally nami-miss ang manila. kasi mall lang ang kulang dito. hindi sa barrio ang bahay ng lola kundi sa city. yun nga lang nakakatawa kapag naka-sakay ako sa jeep tinintingnan ako ng mga kasakay ko kasi tagalog ang salita ko. at kapag kinakausap nila ko tagalog ang sagot ko. naiintindihan ko naman ang salitang waray pero di naman lahat. minsan ginagamitan ko na lang ng common sense. hay! buti na lang tumatama ako…

masaya magbalik-tanaw sa lugar na pinanggalingan ko. hindi naman pala nakaka-boring katulad ng iniisip ko bago ko pumunta dito. kasama ko ang pinsan ko, tita ko, lolo at lola ko. inaasikaso nila ko ng maigi. ang bilis ng oras dito di ko namamalayan na pa-gabi na pala. hindi din ako masyado nag-iisip para sa mga taong malalapit sa kin. kasi naisip ko di naman din nila ko hahanapin. at saka kahit isipin ko sila wala naman ako magagawa… hanggang isip lang talaga.
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